It has been a long while since I have felt good. Whether it has been the cancer (more on that later), the mental health issues or the chronic physical issues and the chronic pain, It has been dealing with the medical establishment. None of these things are easy to deal with alone, but when you compound them all it’s exhausting. I have “met” a group of supportive strangers in an unusual forum that I thought I would never use (again more on that later.) The one person I can count on IRL is my hubby Bruce and perhaps my cats. Secondarily his family. His family has been my family for 24 years.

I have been dealing with some severe depression bordering on suicide. I don’t want to live but I don’t want to unalive myself either. Medications have been added, and I am still on fentanyl patch from surgery and…

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Published by AlexxOphelia

Married spoonie Chronic pain 2 cats 1 puppy love crafting Pagan cancer survivor Liberal independent thinker writer-artist don't like it? Please go away. No patience for haters or bigots. Love my kids and grandkids. Prochoice. BLM. LGBTQ+ Ally

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