This past Friday, I was diagnosed with cancer. It’s in the lymph nodes in my neck. (Bruce refers to them as “nymph lodes” to raise my spirits.) The problem is finding out where it originated. So, more testing. Yippee! A PET scan, most likely.

I’ve been crying a lot. It’s hard not to think of the “What Ifs”. What if I lose my hair? What if I wind up with ugly scars on my neck? What if I lose too much weight? It sucks balls that I don’t have any control while I wait to hear from Mayo for the next steps that I need to take. I hate this!

I’m trying to stay positive and distract myself. But it’s difficult. I take meds for depression. Right now, it’s hard to believe they are working. As I write this, there are 15 minutes left before the close of business. I don’t think I’ll hear today.

I just talked to my daughter. I’ve been wanting to do my hair in Mermaid colors. I didn’t want to upset her with strange color at her wedding. She said “Go for it!”, much to Bruce’s chagrin. So now I need a place to do my hair. Our daughter gifted us with points and our flights are booked for the wedding.

Continuing to look forward. Me.